I love them. :D It was starting to get cloudy when I got on metro in DC to come home, and when we came up above ground again in VA the sky was black and ominous and magnificent. It just started to rain when I got off metro. I got my bike unlocked and was going to go, but it was raining more so I thought I'd wait it out at metro. I don't mind riding my bike home in the rain, but storms can be a bit much depending on how much wind and rain there is. So I stood just inside the door with some other people waiting there and the wind picked up and it started pouring. The wind was blowing the rain a good fifty feet or so into the corridor and everyone kept backing up because they were getting wet. It got pretty bad so I was glad I decided to wait it out instead of trying to ride home right away. I don't think I could've ridden in that. There was a transformer or something that blew outside with some really bright blue flashes and the lights went out at the metro station. Fun fun. :) The rain finally let up so I went outside and found my bike blown over but otherwise ok. I had a lovely bike ride home with light rain and lots of spectacular lightning.
I've been sleeping funny lately. Yesterday I woke up sometime in the night with cramps in both legs. I get them fairly often in one leg or the other and I have to get out of bed and straighten my leg to get rid of them. They're painful enough to wake me up on a regular basis. But I don't think I've ever had them in both legs at the same time before. I must have been sleeping in an odd position, because when I finally woke up that morning I felt like someone had been sitting on my chest all night. It's still been aching on and off since then. I was having weird dreams too. Right before I woke up I dreamt about a friend who was a combination of people I've known in the past. She was skinning live ferrets and rabbits in front of me. O_o I can't remember what I dreamed about last night, but I woke up with a similar morbid feeling.
- Mood:
rejuvenated
I thought I was going to have a relaxing half day at my branch tomorrow. Nope, I'm being sent over to Brookland because they need extra help there (I think they need more help than I can give them). At least I'm done working Saturdays there, but I hate going there so much and thought I wouldn't have to go back. It's not like any other bank I've ever seen. Customers show up forty minutes before the branch opens and wait around. Who the hell does that? On a Saturday morning? Yeah, that's how I want to spend my weekend, hanging around at the bank. There's usually always some crazy person outside muttering (or shouting) crap that makes no sense. And they don't seem to be talking to anyone but themselves. Hopefully tomorrow I won't need to have the security guard escort any of my customers from the branch. That was a bit much.
Also, does anyone have any tips for how to handle hot, humid weather? I'm just about dying here. It's bad enough being a dirty, sweaty, exhausted mess any time I try to go somewhere, but I'm really worried about heat stroke. I'm not used to this at all. I'm ok making quick trips to work usually, but if I'm outside in the sun for more than a half hour I start to get really overheated and unable to cool down. I end up sort of lightheaded and confused so I don't think that's a good sign. It takes me at least another half hour in air conditioning to start to cool off again. I'm not sure if I simply have to get used to it or if there's something I should be doing to keep cool. Bleh. I still prefer it to -30, but it makes me miss the nasty, evil coldness of MN just a little.
- Mood:
cranky
Oh, and I got to meet
![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
wampus_cat this weekend! It's so fun to meet other therians/animal people/whatever you want to call it. We went to Eastern Market so I could get a mirror made of ceiling tin from an old building: http://www.oldegoodthings.com/ It makes me want to cry that these buildings are being torn down, but it's neat that people are salvaging the materials and making things from them. Anyway, it was good to get out and hang out with someone instead of working constantly.- Mood:
artistic - Music:In Flames - Trigger
Work was so stressful today and I'm not entirely sure why. Just a bunch of stuff on top of my foul mood I think. I kept getting all these deposits and couldn't keep up with strapping the money as fast as it came in. I don't like it when my workstation is in a state of chaos and I have so many things on my mind that I don't know what I'm doing anymore. And all this shit came up that I'm not very familiar with like a night deposit discrepancy, because we've never gotten night deposits before. And then one of my pre wrapped rolls of quarters from the shipments we get had a freaking dime in it, leaving my cashbox short 15 cents. At least I didn't have any psychos yelling at me today or drunk people passing out at my window. On Saturday I was at Brookland for hopefully the last time, and I had this completely insane lady trying to withdraw money without an account. The ssecurity guard finally had to make her leave. Oh, and we have the auditors coming tomorrow, which I'm dreading. Banks are highly regulated, and these people make sure we're doing shit the way we're supposed to. I've heard that getting grilled by them is no fun.
Also, I've been in DC for 10 months now (holy shit, that long?) and I have no local friends beyond a couple acquaintances, no place of my own, no car, etc. I feel like I can't even support myself and my life is a failure, and I don't even have anyone here to support me through it. XD My social anxiety, low self esteem, and general disgust for most people really get in the way of socializing. I feel like all most young people want to do is sit around and drink. That was fine in college, but I'm really tired of it now. Not to mention I quit drinking because of the awful migraines I was having. I'd rather be out exploring and seeing neat things or doing something active and fun, or working on creative projects. It's hard to find people with similar interests. *misses Northwolf*
I was going to disable comments because I just needed to vent and didn't want anyone to waste their time. But I like to hear from people if they have anything to say so I'll leave it. I like to reply to all comments, but I'm not sure if I have the energy for it right now.
On a more positive note, I saw the most amazing dog this morning. Don't know what it was.
- Mood:
upset
- Mood:
amused
You Were a Fox |
 A good observer, you often watch others while remaining unseen. Cunning and courageous, you also have a gentle side. |
- Mood:
blah
moonvoice01) Bold what is true about you.
02) Underline what is half true.
03) Italicize what you wish was true about you.
04) Add one true thing about you to the end of the list.
05) Tag five LJ friends.
06) Ask me anything about the bold/italicized/underlined.
- Mood:
dorky
Thank you God! I don't have to work at Brookland anymore on Saturdays, at least as far as I know. I called today and told them I just couldn't do it anymore because I was working every other day of the week at my branch. I haven't had a day off since Memorial Day and I'm completely wiped out. I'm still sick with a cough and sore throat from that cold I had at the beginning of May and I think it's because I'm so exhausted from not having a day to rest each week. And this was after working all of May with just a couple days off. I still don't have full time hours at my branch but have been working thirty five to almost forty hours a week between my branch and Brookland. That's not bad by itself, but what really puts me over the edge is the three to four hours I spend commuting every day, seven days a week. The commute time turns even a half day of work into a full day away from home. Hopefully I'll start having a few days off now and can rest up.
The 4th of July is coming up and I realized this will be the first time in a long time I'm away from North Dakota and all the wonderful exploding things you can buy there. I always used to stock up on fireworks with my friends (preferably big fireworks), drive out to the country, and set them off. I'll really miss that this year.
There are so many fireflies here where I'm staying in VA. I'm scared of bugs, but when I'm riding my bike home in the evening after work, it's magical to see these little lights all over. Nice to know there are at least a few bugs that I don't entirely dislike.
I was finally able to buy a Windstone white male dragon on ebay. A few years ago they were out of my price range, but now the prices are lower for some reason. I've wanted one for ages.
And...I think that's all that's new, or at least all I care to take the time to write about here. I may do a therianthropy update in a while.
- Mood:
relieved
I think I've got both my theriotypes figured out or at least narrowed down really closely. It's funny how being away from the internet helps with that, and I wasn't even trying anymore. They just sort of showed up themselves after I had given up and decided not to settle on any specific species. I'm not exactly just those two animals; I feel that my spirit takes those forms or similar forms or somehow manifests as those animals while being something more, something tied in with certain kinds of energy. I'm not sure how to explain it. But that's ok, because I don't have time anyway.
I have some photos to post too. Not sure when I'll get around to it.
- Mood:
busy
Can you get digital images made from negatives? It would be a herculean task to try to find these old negatives, but it would be worth it for good quality images.
- Location:far from here
And probably no one has any idea of what I'm talking about. XD
( some dream interpretation stuff )
- Mood:
gloomy - Music:In Flames - Alias
I came down with a cold yesterday on my birthday. Such perfect timing. :( The people at work got me a birthday cake, which totally blew me away. I wasn't expecting that at all. And the lady I'm staying with got me a cake as well. Two chocolate cakes, can't beat that. I'm somewhere in the middle of my three weeks working without a day off. I'm sure that's why I'm sick. As soon as I start getting a stretch of time where I'm not getting at least eight hours of sleep a night, I get sick. It happens every time without fail. Throw some stress in there (in other words, working at Brookland on Saturdays) and I'm pretty much screwed.
Thanks to anyone who gave me advice on my last entry about bedding and photos! I think I might have my mom mail my old comforter out here. It's large enough and would be cheaper than getting another one. Then I'll just have to get some larger sized sheets to fit this bed. I have a long silly story about that old comforter (it has an astrology themed design) and how weird it was that I came to have it, but I don't think I'll post it all here. XD There's actually sort of a photo of it in my DA scraps: http://shimmerhawk.deviantart.com/art/wh
I'm probably rambling incoherently. I really need a decent night's sleep.
- Mood:
sick
Does anyone know a good place to buy reasonably priced bedding? I'm looking for something unique, well designed, and antique looking. Anthropologie has some stuff I really like, but it's out of my price range.
I got some nice nature photos when I walked to metro on a rainy day, and also a few from when I arrived in DC and walked to work. There are a lot of pictures but they're all itty bitty.
- Mood:
exhausted
On Friday we had a big celebration at work for the one year anniversary of that branch. There was free food, a prize wheel, a caricaturist, and a guy on stilts making balloon animals. It was fun, though we had to be outside trying to encourage people to open accounts. I'm too shy to be much of a sales person. The funniest thing was that a couple people walked into the bank that morning and told us they had seen a big rat wandering around inside the bank during the night, just hanging out and making itself at home. We just sort of laughed and said we already knew about it.
A couple days ago (must have been Thursday) I was backing my bike out of the shed so I could go to work and this baby squirrel came jumping up to me. It was so cute, I just wanted to pick it up and cuddle it. But I didn't know if it was maybe sick or injured or who knows what. It kept coming up to me and I have no idea why, but when it got too close (within a couple feet) I would back away because I didn't want to be bitten or anything. I did finally run inside to get my camera so I could snap a few pictures before I had to leave for work.
My Personality
98 | |
5 | |
38 | |
1 | |
49 |
| You often resist any cravings or urges that you have, but sometimes you give in, however you tend to lack energy and have difficult initiating activities. People generally perceive you as distant and reserved, and you do not usually reach out to others. You prefer the security and stability brought by conformity to tradition. You are not affected strongly by human suffering, priding yourself on making objective judgments based on reason. You are more concerned with truth and impartial justice than with mercy, however you believe that a certain amount of deception in social relationships is necessary. You are guarded in new relationships and less willing to openly reveal the whole truth about yourself. You take your time when making decisions and will deliberate on all the possible consequences and alternatives. |
The best UGG Boots. |
( more )
We've been having problems at work with a rat in the building. A few people have seen it. There was a big hole chewed in the bathroom wall, and chewing on other walls and on cabinet doors. Yesterday I finally saw the thing and it was huge, bigger than my hand and all brown and scruffy looking. It ran from the kitchen area to the store room and went under the door. I let the manager know where it was and they blocked off the crack under the door. The exterminator came in today and said he found another hole in the wall in the store room where the rat was getting in, but he said it was so large that we shouldn't be calling it a hole, it was more like an explosion of dynamite in the wall or something like that. Made me laugh anyway. I don’t like that the rat is damaging the property and making a mess, but other than that I’m getting a kick out of this whole thing.
When I woke up this morning the power had gone off. Luckily I have a backup battery in my alarm clock that still keeps the alarm working, although the time doesn’t display. I couldn’t set it to go back to sleep for a while. With no power there wasn’t a whole lot I could do out of my usual morning routine so a little time for extra sleep would have been nice. But the clock wouldn’t show the time or do anything, so I got up around five as usual and ate breakfast and tried to get cleaned up a little in candlelight. I wanted to shower so badly, but a cold, dark shower would be terrible and I wouldn’t be able to dry my hair. So I decided that I would have to be disgusting for a day and did my best to wash up in the dark. Just as it was about time for me to leave to ride my bike over to metro, the power came back on. I had to take a shower and stuff, even if it risked making me late for work. Somehow I was quick enough to get to work on time, even though I had to skip my usual stop at Whole Foods for a bagel/pastry.
I came home to another bee in my room tonight which I killed with Lysol and Raid. I feel completely brain dead after the fumes. I can't figure out if the bees are coming in through the windows, the ceiling, or coming in the doors when they're open and then ending up in my room. They’re big and awful and disgusting and something about the shape of their abdomens really grosses me out.
I’m not sure if I fit in very well in Washington. So many people here, especially the young women, are horribly snotty and obsessed with fashion and all this bullshit. I haven’t really gone off on that in my journal yet, sort of been holding it inside even though I’ve had plenty of bs to rant about. I prefer to wear plain, practical clothing, not overpriced status symbols and things that are overly feminine or inhibit my movement. That’s just idiotic. Still, I would feel better if I at least looked like I sort of knew how to dress myself. ;) And I’m flexible and willing to try anything in regards to clothing as long as I like it. Aside from that, the bottom line is that I can’t afford a place to live here. I’m only working 30 to 35 hours a week right now, but if I get full time I still can’t afford even the cheapest apartments around here. In order to be affordable, rent shouldn’t be more than 1/3 of your income. Even if I get full time hours, I’ll be making just barely enough to pay about $600 per month in rent. And that doesn’t take into account deductions from my pay for taxes and insurance. There are virtually no apartments here for $600 a month. And with my current part time income, I could only afford maybe $450 a month. The cheapest efficiencies in the area start around $800 a month, and I don’t want to live in a slum either (I’ve heard quite a few horror stories). I’m appalled by the lack of affordable housing in and around DC and can’t imagine how people can pay for their apartments. Most efficiencies are $1000 and up, many easily $1400 or even more. I’m certainly not getting rich at my job, but I’m making almost twice what I made back in Fargo. My pay would still have to double in order for me to reasonably afford the average efficiency apartment here. It’s fucking crazy. I’d love to be able to afford to have my car too, but at this rate I would pretty much just have to live in my car, lol. Thank God I’m able to stay with a family friend right now.
Everyone says ‘get a roommate,’ but having roommates is not an option for me at this point in my life. I desperately need my own space, privacy, and peace and quiet. Most people don’t understand that, but I can’t be crammed in an apartment with another person, especially someone my age. Maybe in a house, but that’s out of the question. Or with someone I get along with really well and totally trust, which I doubt will happen. I could move back to MN where housing is more affordable, especially in Duluth, but then my pay would also drop for doing the same work. Plus the company I’m with is faring pretty well despite the economy, and I’m not sure how well other banks are doing elsewhere. And I just like this bank.
- Mood:
crazy
After having my bike light stolen I came home Saturday night and found bees in my room. Anyone who's ever been around me knows that I'm absolutely terrified of bees and other large flying insects. I was too scared to swat at them so killed them with Lysol and vacuumed them up. They seem to be gone now and I hope no more show up. I'm not sure how they got in my room, since I'm down in the basement and don't open the windows.
Sunday I went to Target and stocked up on fly swatters and Raid. Summer's on its way so I'd better be prepared! The bugs here seem bigger and nastier than the ones back home. I'm also starting to pick up some things for my room because I can't stand not to make a space my own. None of the furniture is mine though, and the room is full of someone else's books rather than my own. But I'm getting some lamps and some plants and trying to make myself at home. I just wish my Windstones were here. It doesn't feel like home without various gryphons and winged critters perched all over the place!
So Sunday was shaping up to possibly be a good day. I had just gotten home and was starting dinner when I lifted my can of soda up, saw my arm there, but didn't feel it there. MIGRAINE. Perfect end to a perfectly shitty weekend. My left arm and the left side of my face got numb and tingly and I started to get blind spots and my eyes got all fucked up with sparkly things. I took some Tylenol and the headache didn't get too terribly bad. It was really a minor migraine compared to the full blown ones I get which pretty much leave me unable to see, talk, or move. I laid down for a while and that helped. I usually feel almost hung over the day after I get a migraine though, so I don't feel too great today. I've been having weird red meat cravings for the last couple of days too. I take iron supplements to try to help with that, so I don't know what the deal is. I think it must all be related to my cycle.
My journal could use some therianthropy updates, but as usual I have no idea what the hell is going on there. My bird side has been coming on stronger again, and this time with the energy of a real species. I'm not sure what to make of that. I'd pretty much given up on being able to find any real species underneath the vague, fluid impression I get of myself spiritually. The canine side is still in the "what the fuck is that" catagory. I'm really just sitting back and enjoying the ride now instead of trying to make sense of it all.
- Mood:
stressed
I also have some art that I made for a DA ID but I don't know if I'll use it. First off, it's not very good and the anatomy sucks. Second, it's not really finished, but I don't have my painting supplies here so can't do anything with it. Third, I don't have my usual scanner here, and the scanner I do have totally slaughtered it and washed out everything.
- Mood: blah
Your Slanguage Profile |
 Prison Slang: 75% Aussie Slang: 50% British Slang: 25% Canadian Slang: 25% New England Slang: 25% Southern Slang: 25% |
- Mood: amused
- Music:Smashing Pumpkins - Speed Kills
You Are a Hunter Soul |
 You are driven and ambitious - totally self motivated to succeed Actively working to achieve what you want, you are skillful in many areas. You are a natural predator with strong instincts ... and more than a little demanding. You are creative, energetic, and an extremely powerful force. An outdoors person, you like animals and relate to them better than people. You tend to have an explosive personality, but also a good sense of humor. People sometimes see you as arrogant or a know it all. You tend to be a bit of a loner, though you hate to be alone. Souls you are most compatible with: Seeker Soul and Peacemaker Soul |
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